Burp, then sleep.

Anyone who meets my son, whether he is asleep or awake, is always astounded at how noisy he is. He makes the most unnecessary noises, all the time... he moans when he's eating, snores when he's sleeping, and "talks" when he's awake. And he makes boy noises too... groans (loudly) when he's working on a poop, laughs after said poop, and burps as loud as any adult I know.

A few hours ago when I did his 3am feeding, he was falling asleep while eating, so I quickly burped him, rather successfully, if you catch my drift, and put him down in his crib. He still had his eyes closed, so I thought he would just get comfortable and fall right asleep. 10 minutes later, I'm still sitting beside his crib, waiting for him to stop fidgeting. It's pretty unusual for him to move around so much without making any crying noises as he's falling asleep. So, I got up to check to make sure everything was alright, and to see if his eyes were still closed. As I was approaching the crib, H. lets out one of the hugest belches I have ever heard from him... and then sighs in relief and promptly falls right to sleep. I love the way he burps himself after I burp him.

9:17!!!

After numerous days of H. waking up for the day at 7am, he slept today until 9:17! He still had feedings at 2:30am and 6am, but I am excited by this. Or perhaps I just had enough sleep that I'm not grumpy...He is now asleep in my arms.

Oh, I love my son!

A very grumpy H.

It's now half past 11 in the morning, and in the last 12 hours H. has slept maybe 6 of those. That makes for a very grumpy 6-week old. He's been quiet in his crib for approximately 3 minutes now (a record in the last few hours) and I'm hoping this is it, and he'll sleep for a good few hours. But, like every other time there has been a measure of quiet this morning, he'll most likely spit his soother out, then become inconsolable. Oh joy.

Tanty Staci

My sister is quite the interesting person, anyone will tell you that... she show up at my house on her days off work to hang out, and lately, to see her nephew.

It's been a while since she saw H. awake and happy (last time she was here, he was grumpy). Since she was last here, he has started smiling and trying to copy different facial expressions. It was so cute watching them together. They must have sat on the couch for 5 minutes just laughing at each other. So cute.

Another cool thing that happened today was H. managed to sleep while we were out. Usually he stays awake, and gets progressively crankier as the day wears on. Now he's just a little cranky, but he's almost asleep.

And I managed to find sunglasses that don't make me look like a bug. And they're purple! I am so amazed. My face shape makes finding sunglasses a challenge, to say the least. But Stace helped me find some, and I am excited for the sun to come out so I can use them. And I have to remember not to sit on them... that fate befell the last pair I owned, almost 8 years ago.

All in all, a good day.

Just one of those days...

Ever have one of hose days where it seems nothing is going right? That was today for me...

It's now almost 10pm, and since this time yesterday I have had maybe 6 hours of sleep, and I am a girl who needs my sleep. H. decided that he knew better than me, sometime around 5am this morning, and didn't need to go back to sleep... that made H. very grumpy, and mommy very cranky. So, I handed him off to my mom around 7am, after trying desperately to get him to sleep (he got about 20mins), and eat (about half an ounce in an hour and a half). Not good. So not only was I tired and grumpy, but my stubborn son was tired, hungry, and grumpy. After my mom took him, I got about 2 hours of sleep. It would have been more (much, much more), but this morning we had to be up and out of the house at 9am for a bible study.

We were all at church, fed, dressed, and somewhat presentable, at 9:30am, and H. managed to eat another 4oz. (a very large amount for him), and after putting him in my Moby wrap, he fell asleep. He did wake up when I put him in his car seat to leave, around 11am. But, wonderful son that he is, he fell asleep again in the car, and only woke up when we were about to leave the grocery store around 1pm.

We got home, and I fed him, and he had another huge feeding (5.5oz!). Thinking he would go right to sleep, I got my book ready, and snuggled up in my chair by the fire, and wouldn't you know it, somebody didn't go right to sleep. So, another hour, and 2oz more of formula, and he was down (FINALLY!). I managed to check my facebook, and my email, and read a little bit before he woke up for good.

Another 6oz. (where did this appetite come from?), and almost 2 hours later, he was asleep again, and I am writing this. I really don't think I can handle his stubbornness on this much sleep for very much longer. I'm crossing my fingers for him sleeping through the night soon, but with 3-4 hours between feedings right now, I'm not thinking it'll be as soon as I want. And I also kind of wonder where his sudden hatred of going to sleep is. He used to be so good at it. Oh well.

A Little About Me and H.

I figured, while I have a few minutes, I should write a little about myself. I mean, a blog about mommyhood without a post about my pregnancy and labour and all that, isn't really a blog.

I found out I was pregnant in March of 2009, at the tender age of 18. I was so confused about how I felt... I was happy, and scared, and worried, and nervous. It was a lot to feel at once. Everyone was so happy, and supportive. After a while, I was so happy. Pregnancy seemed to agree with me. Besides a few weeks of some morning sickness, everything went well. My first ultrasound at 18 weeks was perfect, and the tech was able to tell me I was definitely having a little boy, and that he was doing very well so far.

I had a few minor issues, though. At my 26 week ultrasound, the tech noticed I had a shortened cervix, which can sometimes lead to early labour, so I was put on bedrest and categorized as a high-risk pregnancy. I also had to have 3 steroid shots, over a span of 36 hours, to help develop the baby's lungs and heart and muscles in case he was born early. I had to go for ultrasounds every 2 weeks for about 8 weeks. There were no changes to anything, and since nothing else was awry, I was taken out of the high-risk category.

At every doctors appointment, my blood pressure, and the baby's heart rate, were always excellent. Towards the end, my weight gain started to drop, to the point I had lost weight at a few weighings, and my belly seemed very small, which worried my doctor... so now I had to go for something called a non-stress test. That basically means that I had 2 disks strapped around my belly... one to measure my uterine pressure, and one to measure the baby's heart rate to see if he was going into distress when I had Braxton Hicks contractions. All four of these tests I had over a 6 week span (from 34-40 weeks) had great results. And my last ultrasound I had (around a week before I was due) showed that the baby was healthy and very well developed.

Everything over the next week went well... but I had a feeling that I was going to go way past my due date. Four days before I was due, when I saw my doctor, I asked her when I could be induced, and she said I should wait until after my due date before asking about it, because I could go into labour on my own. Well, I didn't. I saw her 3 days after my due date, and my usually low blood pressure was quite high, so she said I was to be induced the next morning when she was on call at the hospital.

After waiting more than 12 hours for my induction time, I headed to the hospital for 10pm, with my sister, and my doula meeting us there. I made it with 3 minutes to spare, and was put into a delivery room right away. My water was broken at 10:30, hoping that would start my labour. It didn't, and I got my IV put in at 11. Towards midnight, I got into the tub to labour in the water instead of taking any pain meds. I stayed in the water for about 5 hours. When I got out, I was told I was 5cm (I had started at 2cm). Deciding that I couldn't handle another 6 hours of the pain, I opted to have an epidural. The anesthesiologist came in around 5:30am, and as he was leaving the doctor came in and after checking, told me I was ready to push. In 15 minutes, I had gone from 5cm to fully dilated.

After about 10 pushes in 2 minutes, my son was born at 5:41 am, weighing almost 8 pounds. It was scary and crazy and absolutely beautiful, and I wouldn't have had it any other way.

I went in expecting hours and hours and hours of labour, and hours of pushing, but I was pleasantly suprised. One thing I was not prepared for was the pain. With inductions, you go from no labour to heavy contractions in a matter of minutes. It's really intense. I was not expecting that, and I will never again ask to be induced. But me and my son made it through happy and healthy, and that's all I can ask for.

Scary New World

My son, H., is almost 6 weeks old, and already I can tell so much about him..

• he is stubborn (I really can't imagine where he got that...)
• he really will have the temperament of a red-head
• he is smart
• he is strong
• and he is possibly the cutest baby around.

And I have the daunting job of almost single-handedly raising this little person, and caring for him, and keeping him safe, and nurturing him, for the next 20 years or so... and if he is anything like me, that won't be an easy job...

In the last 5 weeks (since we have come home from the hospital) I have done more laundry, prepared more bottles, changed more diapers, and tried (usually unsuccessfully) to cease more crying fits, than I ever thought possible before my 20th birthday. But as every new mom will tell you, there will be days where changing your socks and eating will seem like an accomplishment, and sleep is a thing of the past, but when your new baby looks into your face and smiles at you, that all seems worth it.

My goal with this blog isn't to sugar-coat parenthood, or to make it scarier than it is, but to show everyone that mommyhood has its ups and downs, and like everything in life, is all about the journey.